How to live a good " christian life" by everyone eles standards, even as an addict

Me and my husband Mark are both decent christian people....... but do you ever wonder to your self as a recovering addict or a recovering alcoholic what are your  boundaries  ? with each other and god? That is one of the things i love so much about my husband is not the big things but the little things with him..... like for example if i was feeling depressed or in a " bitch mode" he would ask " Tiphia is every thing alright, your the reason i try so hard to be a better man, and i love you for you " and that alone is rare. I've been married twice  and the third time is the charm . I felt like with Mark that i married the " one" , the one that god chose for me and not me choosing for myself.... a child like faith is what I've learned to have.When i met my husband  at least  for me because Ive never needed someone more than heroin, but yet it is always in the back of my mind.... " one more shot , and that will be it " lol that's a damn pipe dream . Now think about it? how does the mind of an  addict work? I've always had " lying eyes" as my daddy used to put it, meaning that i could get away with everything, but yet all that you hide from people, will eventually come into the light and with me, it came fast and hard.
        It was actually frightening for my family to watch me self destruct myself and with a suicide mission from hell. I didn't want to live.... Why, so id be judged for my drug problems?, so everyone could tell me " I told ya so ", shit i had too much pride. And Pride can kill you, deprive you from God, a loving family, and what means the most to a sober person , but when your using you'll put everything at risk, even your own life.